Nature's Healing Powers

 Photos from my walk today:

Unsettled Blah

What a strange title?

What a strange world we are living in?

The most apt way I can find to describe my present state is unsettled, and blah.

Supposedly California has turned a corner on Covid.  How do we really know? -  The whole situation is fluid.   Israel was doing so very well, and now 45 children are infected with the Delta variant and 9 adults who were fully vaccinated.  As I have said before - our world has changed, and 'opening up' does not mean everything is back to life as it was.  We are living through a universal experiment. 

I for one haven't shed my mask or gone to the cinema - maybe it is uber cautious - who knows? I will do what makes me feel most comfortable.

The most difficult things I am going through are my eye issues, and the health of people near and dear to me. 

I say near - but they are in far flung places, and it is  difficult to be physically so far away.

So --- blah

Crazy Circles

Today while walking my crazy circles I contemplated the circular nature of all things, but most especially of my life at this time.  I HOPE this is a time that will pass.

My life  is circumscribed by putting drops in my eyes.   In my right eye I am now putting in drops 4 x day (three weeks ago it was 8 x day - so this is an improvement.). In both my eyes are different drops which I put in 4 x day.  I have now been prescribed yet more drops for my right eye, they will be coming in the mail and I think those will be 2 x day!  Thank goodness  I have Siri who dutifully reminds me of the times.  This routine doesn't leave much time for anything else.

I suffer from chronic glaucoma.  I wouldn't normally say suffer, but that is how I am presently feeling. I have had several surgeries in both eyes - (and learned a new vocabulary) - trabulectomies and blebs were words I didn't know.  And now even a new frustration with this.  I am addicted to the spelling bee in the New York Times and do it daily.  Finding words in 7 letters.  I often find bleb - but this is not considered a word by the powers that be (Sam Ezersky if you ever read this, please take note). 

In addition to the surgeries I have used drops and suffered a torture called needling.  And this continues and continues and continues, for the past 25 years! Round and round and round we go

A friend took me to my eye appt. at Kaiser the other day.  After we eventually found her car she drove around and around the parking structure unsure whether we would exit. (At least on this matter I could assure her that we would, eventually, get out. Just as soon as she completed her driving in circles.)

I love knitting.  My neighbourhood knitting shop re-opened a couple of weeks ago (yayyyyyyyy) and I purchased a lovely shawl pattern with yarn.  I was really excited at the thought of making gifts. Well, it is a pattern I am unfamiliar with - lace, and I have now started and ripped it out more times than I can even count. Round and round and round we go

UUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH

Ceasefire ???????

Well, a ceasefire - another ceasefire - endless bloody ceasefires.   Both sides claiming victories - of what???????  No one has gained a thing.  Lives lost, buildings and homes destroyed - again.  And how long will this present ceasefire hold?  

I feel hopeless, as I did when this all began - both sides accusing the other of starting this latest round. Hamas sents its 4,000 and counting missiles first, but they insist Israel began this by stoking the unfortunate incidents on El Aksa.  These incidents, Israel insists were stoked by Hamas who wants to gain control of the West Bank and take over from Fatah.  Hamas insists that ..................

An Orwellian nightmare of a constant state of war - no one even remembering who is fighting whom and why.  And of course the civilians suffer everywhere.  And the amount of money that goes into these weapons and counter weapons.  Imagine if that money were spent on peacetime pursuits like education, public health, the environment -  just imagine.

One thing that does sustain me are the demonstrations for solidarity in Israel.  They are loud and ongoing - just maybe - one day - the voices of cooperation will be heard.

I Cannot be Silent

 How many days has it been since the most recent eruption of horror and violence and tragedy in Israel and in Gaza? 

How many days? How many years? How many centuries? And all that happens is the weapons get worse, the defense systems break down - more people suffer. It gets worse and worse - this time the cities and villages inside Israel are burning.  Arabs and Jews are fighting in the streets.  It is likely that soon rockets will come from the north

As those of you who follow my blog know, I lived in Israel for years. You will also know that my husband was killed in the Yom Kippur War - so very long ago, in 1973.  Where are we now,  2021 - and no end in sight?

What you probably don't know is that as soon as I was told of my husband's death, I said to my mother - "women are suffering and crying in Israel, in Egypt, in Jordan. If only I could contact them."  I felt then, as I do now - a helpless pawn, and that suffering is the same for everyone.

In America I was active in an Israeli peace organization, and went on a speaking tour around the country with an Israeli soldier who opposed the occupation.  I have always opposed the occupation - for the very reasons that we now see happening.   And the Intifaders before then. Occupiers cannot occupy without becoming morally corrupt - this occupation continues to corrupt old an young, civilian and soldier alike.  Like a boil it festers and hurts, and erupts. History has shown that a people cannot be occupied/oppressed forever.

And even now, in the midst of all this I receive notices of demonstrations being called in Arabic and Hebrew - to show solidarity. The photos of my Israeli facebook friends are now framed in signs in Arabic and Hebrew, "I stand in solidarity." 

Many years ago, eons maybe, I traveled around Europe.  In Copenhagen I went to an exhibition of something or other that I no longer remember - but I do remember a slogan.

"Co-existence or No existence."

And here is beloved Mt. Tabor again, the fields of Ein Dor set aflame.

My Crazy Circles

 Today, as I did my crazy circles, I went over the past year while walking round and round and round.

Just after lockdown began last year, in March, I began my walks around my neighbourhood.  My really lovely semi urban hood. As I learned the different paths and windy streets of the hilly area, I marveled at the unimpeded views of the Bay and San Francisco, the Golden Gate Bridge, and Marin Headlands. I enjoy the changing of the seasons displayed in lovely gardens  and tree lined streets.I  feel blessed indeed to have this at my feet, so to speak.  In my wanderings  last year I also discovered a track nearby and have blogged about it.  I still go there, especially when there is inclement weather.  Somehow I find the walking round and round and round very soothing.  I don't have headphones, I don't listen to podcasts, books, or music. Round and round I go looking at the asphalt move under my feet.  The grassy area is well maintained and lovely trees surround the field. I have met masked walkers and dogwalkers and ball players and skateboard folks and workout fanatics and new parents pushing strollers and we greet each other from correct social distances.  Nice to see humans still out there. There was a time last year when even the field was closed to us.  Then when it reopened we couldn't go at all because of the smoke from the fires. That lasted longer than the total lockdown.

Today I went because it is much cooler than it has been and tomorrow I have cataract surgery, and, as I said, the circles calm me. 

Now here's the thing, cataract surgery is not uncommon, probably one of the most common surgeries for the aging population, along with hip and knee replacements.  However, I have glaucoma and have had several eye surgeries - trabulectomies they are called.  Apparently this makes the cataract surgery somewhat more complicated. So round and round and round I go.  I trust my surgeon, I trust my crazy circles.  And, hopefully, I will see my beautiful surroundings more clearly. 

Random thoughts, unrelated to pandemics

 

What have these two pictures to do with my thoughts.  I will tell you.

I grew up in Johannesburg - no mountains, no rivers.  The minedumps are what constitute my memories. Large flat topped gold/sandy dust covered enormous dumps.  Flying in years later I saw them  covered in sparse patches of green grass.  

Years later I lived on Kibbutz Ein Dor situated in the Jezreel Valley - the lower Galilee. Mt. Tabor is in the above photos.  Wherever I went on the kibbutz, from my cottage to the fields, to the dining room, to the childrens' houses - Mt. Tabor was always smiling on us, always there - a Mona Lisa.  The Arab Village of Daburiyah  nestles around her feet.  A road winds up to a monastery and the Church of the Transfiguration.  It is here that Devorah the prophetess promised victory over Sisera. It is near Nazareth, and quite close to Tiberias. (Everything in Israel is quite close.) Sitting in the gardens of a kibbutz house one looks out at the glorious Jezreel Valley, a patchwork of fields, dotted with settlements. Gentle rolling hills in the spring covered in green and lupine, red poppies, an abundance of flowers, pink and white almond blossoms. Followed by  the comes the season of platinum and gold.  Fields of wheat and sorghum.  Then the harvest and the brown earth.  And always, there is Mt. Tabor.

And the above, the view from my back door.  Mt. Tamalpais.  Always there, sometimes a sharp silhouette, sometimes enshrouded,  always breathtaking sunsets.  There, ever present, blessing us with her presence. The Sleeping Lady, sacred and holy land to many Native American Tribes. A Mountain of legends and beauty.  She has sustained me throughout this strange time.l

As I walked on my crazy circles today, my settled on these two most precious and special mountains that have graced my life. And for them, I give thanks