2025

 

The doorway to 2025.

Happy Holidays

 Today is Xmas Day - so merry Xmas to everyone.  Tonight is the first candle of Hanukah - so Hanukah Sameach to everyone.  This is the time of miracles - please dear God - may we all be blessed with the miracle of inner light and understanding.

Tomorrow I leave for the airport at 2.15 am.  I have a 6.00 a.m. flight to Brussels.  2.30 am is about the same time the Houthis have been sending missiles - waking everyone well before dawn to go to the shelters.  I PRAY there isn't an alarm on the way to the airport. I pray there won't be any alarms. No alarms, no missiles, no shrapnel.......

I am meeting a dear dear friend from Texas (of all places) and we will spend a week in Bruges.  I return on January 1st 2025, and my blog will continue then.

Love to everyone, and please all be well, and safe,   🥰. and kind to one another.

The Sky Above Israel Today

 The heavens are waiting for the hostages to be returned.

Did Bibi see the sky today?

Please come home. 

(These were actually trails created by Israeli Pilots)

Warm and Dry

Well, we had about 4 days of winter.  That seems to be it for winter and rain, unless January and February bring much needed rain.

And the hostages remain in the tunnels of Gaza.  And Bibi has begun his circus in the courts.  And the Justice Minister wants to revive the Judicial Coup. And Ben Gvir and Smotrich don't want the hostages back so that they can carry out their ethnic cleansing and settle in Gaza. And Bashar Assad is gone, and Israel is obliterating Syria's stockpile of weapons, and Erdogan has set his sights on Syria. 

And the hostages remain in the tunnels of Gaza.

And hundreds of thousands continue to protest in Tel Aviv, in Jerusalem, in Caesarea, in Beer Sheva, in Raanana, in Cfar Saba, at junctions and bridges all over the country.  No one listens, no one cares.

And new laws are being proposed - against freedom of speech, of arrests without trial - South Africa revisited. Wild settler rampage and pillage properties and villages in the West Bank. Some people have returned to the destroyed north, others wont go back yet. 

And drones fly and hit buildings and aren't detected.

And prices everywhere continue to reach staggering heights. More increases are coming in January - mortgages, insurance, water, electricity. 

And the hostages remain in the tunnels of Gaza.

And soldiers continue to get killed. And no one knows what is going to happen.

Cold and Drizzly

These last few days have been cold and drizzly - I LOVE this weather.  One can actually do something,  take a walk, work in the greenhouse,  walk to a bus stop, go shopping.  I find no fault at all in the weather. If only I, and everyone I knew, felt the same about this "ceasefire." I have yet to meet one person who trusts it, who thinks it will hold, who does not dread what is coming next. Cold, drizzly, pleasant conditions for us living here in the center of the country.  Not so for the soldiers, for the people in Gaza, in Lebanon, in the north of Israel in the south - those who will not and can not return to their homes.  And over everything and everyone, the unimaginable plight of the hostages casts its poll.  It lies above us like a soggy, drippng, sodden, mud soaked shroud.

The sound of overhead planes continues to be unnerving, I am still scared to take a shower for longer than a nanosecond - what if the siren goes and I have to run to the building next door.  I thought I had perfected the art of a lightning shower in drought stricken California - those were long compared with the few seconds it takes me here.

The headlines are apocalyptic. Bibi wants to curtail the freedom of speech.  The blood crazed messianic zealots want to settle in Gaza.  Reservists are not getting paid. The north is destroyed - homes have to be rebuilt, schools opened, no one is willing to return.  This country is broken.  And Sara Netanyahu wants compensation as victim of terror and crime!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Because some lights were broken in their home in Caesarea - they weren't there, and SO WHAT.??? The whole scenario may be laughable (sort of) if it weren't so very very sad. 

This is why I haven't written much,,,, but I promised those interested that I will continue, so I try.

The Death of Democracy?

This morning (a.m. in Israel) I turned on CNN and in utter disbelief looked at the colour red spreading across America. "This cannot be happening again," I texted to my friends in America, I really feel like a witness to the death of democracy.  Last night Netanyahu fired Gallant, the Defense Minister, in the middle of a war.  Now words to describe this, and he did it just to save his coalition.  I feel like we, the citizens of the world, are sliding down a steep slide that is getting steadily steeper. The downward slide  gets faster, and there is nothing to hold on to.  Nowhere to brake our fall.  Nothing.

To calm myself this morning, after my workout in the gym I went to the plant nursery.  I sat down surrounded by pots of colourful flowers, fragrant herbs ,and shrubs - seedlings sprouting, bursts of colour, new life, the deep rich smell of earth. There were only four of us;  the woman in charge, called Iris (I mean, did she have any other choice in life but to work with plants?) a transplanted American, like myself, and an annoying woman who had come to visit Protea and sees it as her future home.  Annoying to me because of her loud screechy voice.  The American and myself were of course talking about the elections, when, at 11.20, the siren started.  The woman in charge told us there is a shelter in the nearby cafe, and off we went.  We were being herded into the small room by a lovely young man who is now in charge of the cafe.  Lots of old people I had never seen before - afterwards the young man told me they come for their morning coffee from the surrounding moshavim.  A few of us heard explosions, but apparently most of the people were - let me put it nicely, hard of hearing.  They are lucky!  After 10 minutes we left, but the calm of the nursery was over.  We called it a day.

I had planned to go to the supermarket yesterday, but landed up having a discussion with someone after arabic and didn't go.  Lesson to me - NEVER put off what you plan till a later time.  Now I am too bloody scared to go, not only because of the missiles, but what if Iran attacks at any moment?  But then, if there is a full scale attack from Iran, I may never need food again.

Some of my family members are due to return from Germany today - on TV they said a missile exploded in the area of the airport. Quick texts between all family members as to what will happen. It seems like the airport is open and they will make it back, although they might not want to return.

 On TV - reports of where the missiles had fallen, then four leaders of the opposition speaking about the firing of Gallant, and the current and present danger.  Then came a long documentary on the rise of Trump - I  turned it off, I really can't handle it.

I will have a cup of rooibos tea.

Nerves

 I think it is safe to say that my nerves are shredded.  Why, I wonder, do I (in fact 'we') use the phrase 'safe to say?'  What could happen to me that would make it unsafe to say, and what, exactly, does it mean - safe to say.  This is a conundrum for another time.  Whatever is safe or not safe to say, is that my nerves are shredded.  

I feel I have lost track of what holiday we are now about to 'celebrate'.  I think it is Simchat Tora, which is exactly the black and terrible day of 7th October 2023.  Because of these holidays the regular schedule is not the same - some days there are activities as usual, somedays there aren't. Of course here in the Village our management keeps us informed of what is and isn't happening, but nevertheless it is hard to keep track. The swimming pool is not in use as it is being repaired, so that is one activity that is not happening. 

On a personal level it is hard to keep up of which times and which days we run to the shelter, which nights are 'quiet', which days are 'quiet.' Quiet is relative, because quiet in this area doesn't mean it is quiet up north, or in the lower Galilee, or down south, or in the West Bank, or if there are successful or unsuccessful terrorist attacks in various towns. It merely means, this little area is quiet.  We do hear booms, but if there are no sirens, then we are not in the direct line of fire.

Last week before the Succot holiday I was invited to friends for the morning of Succot.  We thought it would be nice just to be together for a couple of hours.  My friend had invited me the day before, and I left her a message thanking her, asking what I should bring, and also, just by the way, to let her know I was feeling extremely unsettled.  All day I had a bad feeling - worse than normal. That night there were explosions, sirens, incoming drones. I watched TV and the announcer said a drone had hit something near Wadi Ara, then they said Binyamina, then they said 6 people wounded, 10 people, the number quickly rose to 67.  This was not in Binyamina - 67 people wouldn't have been outside - it must be an army base.  4 people killed, we clung to the news, but no names or places were announced.  At 11.30 I received a phone call from the same friend who had invited me, and my heart pounded fiercely - her grandson is in basic training. She called to tell me the attack had been at his army base - him and his unit were OK - obviously dozens of other young men weren't.  

NONE of this makes for settled nerves.  No further sirens for a few days, but one's nervous system is on high alert.  Driving in a car - if there is a siren, stop and go away from the car and lie down.  If you are near a shelter, go to the shelter, we know the drill.  We know being in a shelter saves lives.  

A few days and nights of 'quiet.' Then this morning I had to get up early as the cleaning lady was due to come. I looked at my phone and saw that missiles were being sent everywhere in the North and the Center.

We are in the Center, but it was quiet. I have a meditation app I listen to every morning, and it always amazes me how the subject exactly ties into what is happening. This morning the subject was 'how commotion can be useful in our practice."  In other words, how to find peace within chaos.  Hahhhhhhh - they spoke about outside noises and how to deal with them - that we think we should be meditating in a peaceful quiet manner in a peaceful quiet world, but inevitably interference happens.  As I finished the practice there was a tremendous explosion - peace is not what I experienced. While waiting for the siren I put on slippers, grabbed my phone and ran to the shelter.

The wi fi doesn't work in the shelter.  After 10 minutes we thought it would be safe to leave, but I called the front desk to check. The man who answered shouted at me "there was no siren."    WHAT???? - 6 of us were sitting in the shelter because of the explosion and siren.  He began to argue with me and I slammed the phone down.  So much for peace in chaos.

We did leave - but of course everyone is on edge.  And, just to let you all know, I DO think of the people in Gaza, in Lebanon, in Ukraine, in Sudan - I think of the upcoming American elections.  I just cannot dwell on these thoughts endlessly.

Yesterday there was a funeral for a girl of 22 who committed suicide a year after the Nova massacre.  On TV they said there has been a 60% rise in anxiety and stress amongst children.  All our nerves are shredded.

And so today, after the upsetting morning- I went to the gym, and am now blogging. I will do my arabic homework as I have a lesson this afternoon - so, life continues. I bought vegetables, flowers, accepted an invitation to a birthday brunch. This is how it goes.